Converse to what some people seem to think, fat folks have feelings.
Street harassment is supposed to be seen as a compliment. "Someone's paying attention to you, shouldn't you be happy?
You're supposed to be happy if someone leans creepily over you in a bar and tries to chat you up, and if that attention is unwanted, you're looked upon as strange or ungrateful. "Conversely, you're expected to grin and bear it when prettier friends grab the attention of someone you're interested in.
I don't generally look for that sort of experience, and I think it's kind of gross that I'm expected to "suck it up" because "that's what people do at bars" and "you're not in any position to pick and choose."And a lot of what I'm talking about, especially women being bought drinks and then expected to go home with the drink-buyer, is universal to all women.
It's not just a fat woman thing, though I feel like there is more of a "take what you get and like it" vibe around it for fat and unattractive women.
I'm told to "go on dating websites." I did that, and met someone that I thought I could start a relationship with.
When the first date turned sour and I experienced some unwanted touching and kissing which didn't stop when I said "no," I was told that I'm too much of a prude, and I should take what I can get.
And if I don't pay attention to the people making me feel uncomfortable, I'm looked upon as too picky and ungrateful, when really, I just want to be respected and treated like a human being.
In short, I feel like I can't win when it comes to dating, and I've become a little bitter and jaded about it.
We can look past the way people look, how awkward they might feel, and into their hearts.
We don't have to accept unwanted attention because we'll never get anything else. We are human beings, just like everyone else in society.
Lost weight, put on more makeup, tried to do something with our hair. I've connected with people on deeper levels and enjoyed being loved. We're not jokes, disgusting, ugly, or anything else, and anyone who wants to make us feel that way isn't worth our time.